Where My Dawgs At???

So here it is, the infamous Dead Dog Story...



I was living on 15th and P at the time with Lee and Sean VD and we had a bunch of people over, it was a hot summer day, we decided to all go get falafels at this spot in Dupont Circle and when we walked past the park next to Cafe Luna we saw a cloud of flies flying around something that smelled putrid. As young inquisitive men and women we were, we looked and found a headless, skinned dog; we all dry heaved a couple times from the smell and decided to go get food while we figured out what to do with such finding. Later we found out there was a serial dog killer in DC and we had found one of his victims. So while over falafels somebody, I can't remember who, said "lets throw it at the Earthwell House". We had a running feud with the Earthwell people for a long time since as I said in one of my earlier posts, they were more interested in climbing the hardcore ladder than the actual scene and doing "shady" promoter practices of offering special treatment to bands that we wouldn't do since we were straight males, but oh well, we didn't get along and that's that, we were young, liked pranks and this was a perfect opportunity to score one for the good guys, haha. We finished eating, went home, got a plastic recycling bin and went to get our prey, we found a stick and after several attempts we were able to get the dog in the basket, a couple people were actually puking from the smell and the swarm of flies was attacking us. We could barely hold it since the smell was so strong, we put the bin in the back of Lee's truck and here the 2nd part of this great idea, which finally we couldn't carry out, was hatched, we decided to douse the dog in lighter fluid, the idea being the famous poo bag, go to the Earthwell House, set it on fire and when somebody came out to stomp it out, they would get "bitten" by the dog. So Lee and me in his truck, a car full of people behind us with their windows rolled up, we inside the truck could barely keep it together from the smell, and we drive to George Washington University, home of... The plan was set, once there Sean Vd and me would grab the bin, dump it on their front door and Sean would set it on fire, when we get a block away, Lee takes the wrong turn and drives the wrong way down a street, and of course we get pulled over, DC Police goes thru the motions, what are you doing? where are you coming from? we played little lost white kids from Virginia lost in big, bad DC, he gave us directions and sent us on our way, whats amazing about that is that when we got pulled over, the cop was standing less than a foot away form the dog, we were all half puking and he was standing there like nothing, we never figured out how the hell he didn't smell it. So, we drive once around the block, stop in front of the house, grab the bin and as we are getting to the door a light comes on, and also there was a frat house next to theirs with a bunch of people in the front, so we get spooked and drive away, a couple blocks away we gather, talk and decide not to set it on fire since it was going to raise too much attention, and that the light was one of those motion sensor ones, so we go in for round 2, again we stop, get out and light comes on, a frat boy hey!s us, we could barely stand half from laughing at the situation, half from the odor, and instead of dumping the bin we swing it, with Fido hitting the storm door and getting stuck there, keep in mind the dog was all gelatinous and the sort from being in whatever state of decay it was, and starts sliding down the door in its best horror movie impersonation, leaving a streak of goo behind. We ran to the truck and car and drove away as we saw the front door opening, probably from hearing the noise. As we got home we started calling the house asking about our missing dog, this went on for about a week, we also posted "Have You Seen Him?" posters around their house with a picture of a headless dog and their number, we didn't know this but the day before, a different group of kids had brained their house, yeah they had thrown cow brains at them for probably similar reasons as ours, so they weren't on their best week ever. There was also an issue of XOffXCenterX zine with the same picture and a few weeks later Brother's Keeper was playing their basement, we all went, WOOFed WOOFed our way thru their set, and I promised Mikeski a show if they covered "Shallow Grave" by his former band Sumethin To Prove, they played it and sent the song out to the Dead Dog Crew, haha...


Yeah looking back, it was probably not the coolest thing to do, but it was perfect for the period when it happened. George Washington University shows were always kind of fun nnonetheless, there's a great story about pulling down the ceiling and dancing with the tiles during Floorpunch to be told at a later time. All kinds of stories were invented from the above original story, like that we killed the dog, skinned it and kept the hide, and a bunch more. At some point there were rumors of the FBI being involved, never knew up to what point this was true, there was even talk of cameras being installed at the house. And of course we felt sorry for the dog, we were all vegetarian or vegan at that point, but it was already dead. Till the next one...